Come on In! Just Ignore the Mess.

“Don’t answer the door!” I hissed at my son as the doorbell rang and I ducked out of sight. The sound of a doorbell shouldn’t scream danger, and yet there I stood in the middle of my kitchen, frozen and on high alert. I’ve clearly overindulged in way too many crime shows over the years. I was fully prepared to ignore the intruders until they gave up and left, but my son (who’s much braver than I am), peeked his head around the corner to investigate.

“Wait.” He paused and did a double-take. “That looks like Chad!” He stepped squarely into the hall. “That IS Chad!”

It took me several moments to process what was happening. It was June 19, 2020. My family had spent 14 straight weeks at home. The Coronavirus had changed everything. No school in person. No church in person. No sports. No vacations. No contact.

We’d started shopping online. Facetime and Zoom calls were the only source of interaction we had with friends and family, and besides a few doctors appointments, we hadn’t had a conversation with anyone face to face in what felt like an eternity. Not everyone was living this way, which made the feelings of isolation even more intense.

14 weeks.

My whole family (parents and sisters included) had planned a vacation to Florida. We were going to spend a few days at Disney, a couple of days at the beach, and top it off with a Caribbean cruise. We all live in different states and we try to meet up twice a year. We don’t typically go big with our vacation destinations, but several major birthdays and anniversary milestones fell within the same year and we decided our time together in 2020 should be epic. 2020 has certainly been epic, but not at all for the reasons we thought it would be!

Disney and the cruise were obviously canceled. Despite this, my parents and little sister, Tori, along with my older sister, Kristen, and her family still met up in Florida for a few days. We chose not to go. I was genuinely happy the rest of my family were able to spend time together, but I was crushed that we weren’t there with them. More than anything I was sad for my kids.

So, there I was in my kitchen, in 100% disbelief that my brother-in-law Chad, my sister Kristen, and my niece Alana were standing on our doorstep. They’d gone out of their way on their drive home just to drop by and say hello. I looked down at my tattered pajama pants and ratty t-shirt. Too late to fix that. My daughter, Leyla, had just had her wisdom teeth pulled that morning, but you wouldn’t have known it as fast as she sprinted towards the door!  

I rounded the corner and Aydin and Leyla stood in the open doorway, face to face with their loved ones, in utter shock. There was a brief moment of awkwardness when I think they actually didn’t know if they’d be welcomed into our home. “Can we come in?” they asked laughingly.

I can’t remember a time where true joy has spread so quickly in my heart than at that moment. Besides joy though, do you know what else I felt? Shame, embarrassment, and even a little fear.

It’s true. And here’s why: My house was a mess.

Not just any mess though. A mess with a capital “M”! And I was horrified.

It wasn’t the kind of mess where you have 1 pair of shoes left in the entryway and a couple of pieces of mail left out on the counter. That kind of mess can be cleaned up in about 30 seconds flat. No, this mess was more like, “I’m so glad you’re here, but you might want to close your eyes because you’re never going to look at me the same after you see what you’re about to see”…kind of a mess. No, my home won’t be the next featured on Hoarders, but as far as tidiness goes, I definitely wasn’t on my A-game.

I mentioned earlier that my daughter had her wisdom teeth pulled that very morning. What I didn’t mention was that we didn’t know she was having that operation until the night before, so I was anything but prepared. There were soup, Jell-O, and Gatorade containers covering one counter, a mound of meds on another, and so many pots and pans piled in the sink you’d think I hadn’t done dishes in a week. There’s only 4 of us! The number of dishes we go through is astounding!

Anyhow, my coffee table was sitting behind my couch. It was moved from its normal spot in our living room to accommodate the twin size mattress and another blow-up mattress that we’d recently used for a “slumber party”. The kids liked the beds in the living room, so they stayed. Was there space to walk? No. But watching TV sure was comfy! The coffee table itself had Amazon packages, a few of my son’s books, and all kinds of randomness scattered around.

Our dining room table had been taken over by my husband who had started working from home: Computers, business cards, and papers galore. He’d also just bought an inflatable kayak for himself and my son. The box and all the packings were still strewn across the floor of the family room. If my family had shown up one day sooner, they could’ve witnessed a 12-foot kayak sitting in the middle of my house.

So, it was THAT kind of mess.

Did my family care? No. Did they make me feel bad about it? Of course not! Because all they wanted to do was spend time with us, which we did…on the back patio. Where it was clean(ish).

When my family left my situation looked the same. My house was still a disaster. The coronavirus hadn’t magically disappeared in those few short hours. But my heart was changed. My spirit had lifted, and I was full of hope. Not only that, but I also found the motivation to clean up! Bit by bit I tackled the mess and it was cleaned up in no time at all.

In much the same way, we have an opportunity every single day to invite Jesus into our lives. But that can be a scary thought, right? We hear Him knocking, look at the mess surrounding us and all we feel is shame and embarrassment. Why would I willingly invite someone into that kind of mess? We hear that knock and stand frozen in fear. Oh, but He’s a gracious God, not one to force His way inside our hearts.

I used to think He was only concerned with my messes. My mistakes. That His main purpose in showing up was to judge my failures and point out all I needed to fix.

Now I realize He just wants me.

He just wants you.

He just wants to spend time with us.

He knows we might be facing some fears. He knows there are some things we’re trying to hide. Some junk we’ve allowed to pile up in our lives that shouldn’t be there. The thing is, He’s not worried about all that stuff. The mess, the pain, the bitterness, the scars, the sin we try so desperately to keep locked behind closed doors; It can all be dealt with in time.

When we’re courageous enough to welcome Him into our hearts, He’ll fill us with joy and hope. But He won’t stop there! If we let Him stay a while, He’ll clean us up from the inside out.

Two months later and I’m still surprised that my family came to visit us.

They came for us. They went out of their way to show up when they knew we needed them. They sacrificed their time and energy to let us know they cared. They stood at my front door and took a chance of not being invited in.  

But what’s even more astonishing is this:

Jesus came for us! He went out of His way to show up because He knew we’d be sitting here in 2020 in desperate need of Him. He sacrificed His life to show us how much He cares. And He stands at the door of our hearts, knowing there’s a chance we won’t invite Him in. But still, he knocks.

The choice is yours. Will you invite Him in?

“Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.”

Revelations 3:20